{"id":52135,"date":"2018-02-03T15:42:42","date_gmt":"2018-02-03T21:42:42","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.seekingthestill.com\/?p=52135"},"modified":"2020-08-15T13:55:17","modified_gmt":"2020-08-15T18:55:17","slug":"i-once-was-lost","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/oldseekingthestill.com\/website_e02ce2c0\/i-once-was-lost\/","title":{"rendered":"I Once Was Lost"},"content":{"rendered":"\n[et_pb_section][et_pb_row][et_pb_column type=&#8221;4_4&#8243;][et_pb_text]<h1>It was one of those days.<\/h1>\r\n&nbsp;\r\n\r\nA day where my anxiety reigned and shrouded me with it\u2019s dark veil. This thing called anxiety had barreled into my life over the past year, and I was still waiting for rescue. I barely made it through each day as a wife, mom of two, and Director of Communications at my church.\r\n\r\n&nbsp;\r\n<h2>During this dark time, I often felt suffocated and paralyzed.<\/h2>\r\n&nbsp;\r\n\r\nLike I was living under water and struggling to make my way to the surface for a breath of air. When panic overcame me at work, I sought refuge in the only place I had privacy \u2013 the back of my van. I curled up on the folded seats. I prayed. I meditated. I breathed. I did anything that might calm the surge of adrenaline coursing through my body and irrational thoughts in my mind.\r\n\r\nIf close my eyes, I still see myself laying there in isolation, desperate for saving. I cried, I raged, and I prayed.\r\n\r\n&nbsp;\r\n<h2>I felt alone. So very alone.<\/h2>\r\n&nbsp;\r\n\r\nOutside the van, kids were running around at recess. Happy and carefree, they paraded by, unaware that a shell of a woman was lying on her back just feet away, praying for the pain to stop and for the strength to rise.\r\n\r\nThen I heard it. A knock on my back window. Sitting up, I saw a friend and co-worker. Her face pressed up against the tinted glass, searching for me curled inside.\r\n\r\n&nbsp;\r\n<h2>\u201cI\u2019ve been looking for you,\u201d she said as I opened the hatch.<\/h2>\r\n&nbsp;\r\n\r\nClimbing inside, she sat cross legged with me \u2013 two grown women finding respite from the world in an unlikely place \u2013 the back of a mini-van. My friend acted like it was the most natural thing to sit there with me. I talked about my fears, and she listened. Her presence calmed me.\r\n\r\nShe didn\u2019t have answers, but she was there \u2013 she came to find me, to listen, and that was enough to get me through another day.\r\n\r\nI wonder if you have that same tendency to retreat when the world just seems to be too much? Do you hide away and try to go it alone?\r\n\r\n&nbsp;\r\n<h2>Messy Miracle, there is Someone knocking, waiting for you to open the door and let Him in.<\/h2>\r\n&nbsp;\r\n\r\nJesus, too, says, \u201cI\u2019ve been looking for you.\u201d\r\n\r\nWhen I was young, I was fascinated by a painting of Jesus knocking on a door. It was so interesting because there was no knob on the exterior of that door \u2013 it could only be opened from the inside. Revelation 3:20 says, \u201cBehold, I stand at the door and knock. If anyone hears my voice and opens the door, I will come in to him and eat with him, and he with me.\u201d\r\n\r\nJesus will come looking for you no matter where you are, what you\u2019re feeling, or what you\u2019ve done. Scripture tells us that as our Good Shepherd, He will leave the 99 to look for the one. That one is you. He will peer through the window in the door of your heart and wait as long as it takes for you to let Him in.\r\n\r\nIt\u2019s as simple as word, a whisper, a silent prayer. \u201cCome, Lord Jesus.\u201d\r\n\r\nAnd when He enters in that most unlikely place, you won\u2019t be lost anymore.\r\n\r\nXOXOXO,\r\nLaura\r\n\r\n&nbsp;[\/et_pb_text][\/et_pb_column][\/et_pb_row][\/et_pb_section]\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p><div class=\"et_pb_section et_pb_section_0 et_section_regular\" >\n\t\t\t\t\n\t\t\t\t\n\t\t\t\t\n\t\t\t\t\n\t\t\t\t\n\t\t\t\t\n\t\t\t\t\n\t\t\t\t\n\t\t\t\t\n\t\t\t<\/div><div class=\"et_pb_row et_pb_row_0 et_pb_row_empty\">\n\t\t\t\t\n\t\t\t\t\n\t\t\t\t\n\t\t\t\t\n\t\t\t\t\n\t\t\t<\/div><div class=\"et_pb_module et_pb_text et_pb_text_0  et_pb_text_align_left et_pb_bg_layout_light\">\n\t\t\t\t\n\t\t\t\t\n\t\t\t\t\n\t\t\t\t\n\t\t\t\t\n\t\t\t<\/div>It was one of those days. &nbsp; A day where my anxiety reigned and shrouded me with it\u2019s dark veil. This thing called anxiety had barreled into my life over the past year, and I was still waiting for rescue. I barely made it through each day as a wife, mom of two, and Director [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":52137,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"nf_dc_page":"","_et_pb_use_builder":"on","_et_pb_old_content":"","_et_gb_content_width":"","_exactmetrics_skip_tracking":false,"_exactmetrics_sitenote_active":false,"_exactmetrics_sitenote_note":"","_exactmetrics_sitenote_category":0,"wds_primary_category":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[11,17,18,128],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-52135","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-anxiety","category-faith","category-support","category-the-story"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v27.2 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>I Once Was Lost - Seeking The Still with Dr. Laura Fleetwood<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/jfz.xeo.mybluehost.me\/website_e02ce2c0\/i-once-was-lost\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"I Once Was Lost - Seeking The Still with Dr. Laura Fleetwood\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"It was one of those days. &nbsp; A day where my anxiety reigned and shrouded me with it\u2019s dark veil. 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