{"id":60,"date":"2011-03-03T12:50:00","date_gmt":"2011-03-03T18:50:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.seekingthestill.com\/?p=60"},"modified":"2020-06-26T11:28:29","modified_gmt":"2020-06-26T16:28:29","slug":"when-truth-hurts-week-7","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/oldseekingthestill.com\/website_e02ce2c0\/when-truth-hurts-week-7\/","title":{"rendered":"When the Truth Hurts – Week 7"},"content":{"rendered":"
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It was evaluation time, again.\u00a0 That wonderful time of year when I get to see exactly what my students think of me, no holds barred.\u00a0 24 feedback surveys from last semester’s class.\u00a0 Fabulous results.\u00a0 Great scores.\u00a0 With the exception of\u00a02 forms with hastily scrawled comments.<\/p>\n

The instructor has an annoying habit of clicking her teeth at the beginning of her sentences when she talks.\u00a0 Instructor annoys me and ALL the class when she clicks her teeth.\u00a0 I find it hard to concentrate.<\/i><\/p>\n

You HAVE GOT to be kidding me<\/i>, the voice in my head responded. \u00a0 I have been teaching college courses for over three years with glowing reports.\u00a0 Nobody has ever mentioned this to me before.\u00a0 My stomach dropped, my face turned red, and I immediately went into defense mode.<\/p>\n

I do not click my teeth.\u00a0 I would notice if I did something that annoying.\u00a0 I have won presentation awards and heard myself on tv and radio.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0There is no chance I do that.\u00a0 It must have been the students I caught cheating trying to get back at me.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 And on and on and on.<\/i><\/p>\n

After about 30 minutes of stewing and brewing (yes, I admit that 2 little comments worked me into a tizzy – I’m obsessive like that)<\/i>, I calmed down and started thinking logically again.\u00a0\u00a0I had a class coming in 20 minutes, so I decided to put myself to the test.\u00a0 I was on hyper-alert for any teeth clicking. Smirk.<\/i><\/p>\n

To make a long story short, when I go into “teacher mode,” I do indeed have this tendency to start my sentences with\u00a0a click\u00a0like I’m ticking off a checklist.\u00a0 I don’t do it in regular conversation or even when I give a presentation, but there it was like a slap in the face.<\/p>\n

I made it through that class without one single “click” and made a promise to myself that I will never annoy my students that way, again.\u00a0 After class I mentioned the comments to Justin who said, “Oh yeah, you do that on the phone sometimes, too.”\u00a0 I gave him my best if-looks-could-kill glare.\u00a0 Who knew?<\/p>\n

Since that dreaded incident, I’ve been thinking about why those comments hurt so badly.\u00a0 Why wasn’t I open to hearing feedback that in the end would make me more effective at my job?\u00a0 I’m convinced it comes down to ego.\u00a0 I spend so much time trying to inflate my sense of worth that any critique really does hurt.\u00a0 Oh, but how willing I am to point out all the things that others do wrong!\u00a0 Perhaps not verbally, but my head constantly rings with criticism. It’s not a nice place to be.<\/p>\n

Matthew 7:5 reminds us, you hypocrite, first take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother’s eye.\u00a0 <\/i>If I’m honest with myself, that is exactly what I am.\u00a0 A hypocrite.\u00a0 Thankfully, I am still loved by many, hypocrisy, teeth-clicking and all!<\/p>\n

So, here’s the thing.\u00a0 It can be difficult to know constructive criticism from hurtful criticism.\u00a0 One comes from genuine love and care.\u00a0 The other comes from dark places of jealousy, hatred, and fear.\u00a0 The real question we must ask ourselves is this: Will this advice or criticism make us more of who we are meant to be?\u00a0 <\/i>Is there an element of truth, no matter how hard to swallow, that could help us move forward on the path God has given?\u00a0 If the answer is yes, think about it.\u00a0 Pray about it.\u00a0 Give it a test drive.\u00a0 If the answer is no, let it go and move on.<\/p>\n

Some of the best advice I received while working in the corporate world was to avoid being a sponge with hurtful criticism.\u00a0 Be a duck instead and let it roll right of your back!\u00a0 If we would all be a bit more open to constructive feedback and more dismissive to hurtful feedback, the word would be better place.<\/p>\n

So…another lesson learned in this adventure called life: Sometimes the truth hurts, but anything can be overcome in the spirit of love.\u00a0 Any annoying habits that you want to share with the world?<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

It was evaluation time, again.\u00a0 That wonderful time of year when I get to see exactly what my students think of me, no holds barred.\u00a0 24 feedback surveys from last semester’s class.\u00a0 Fabulous results.\u00a0 Great scores.\u00a0 With the exception of\u00a02 forms with hastily scrawled comments. The instructor has an annoying habit of clicking her teeth […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":333,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"nf_dc_page":"","_et_pb_use_builder":"","_et_pb_old_content":"","_et_gb_content_width":"","_exactmetrics_skip_tracking":false,"_exactmetrics_sitenote_active":false,"_exactmetrics_sitenote_note":"","_exactmetrics_sitenote_category":0,"wds_primary_category":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[11,1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-60","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-anxiety","category-uncategorized"],"yoast_head":"\nWhen the Truth Hurts - Week 7 - Seeking The Still with Dr. Laura Fleetwood<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/jfz.xeo.mybluehost.me\/website_e02ce2c0\/when-truth-hurts-week-7\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"When the Truth Hurts - Week 7 - Seeking The Still with Dr. Laura Fleetwood\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"It was evaluation time, again.\u00a0 That wonderful time of year when I get to see exactly what my students think of me, no holds barred.\u00a0 24 feedback surveys from last semester’s class.\u00a0 Fabulous results.\u00a0 Great scores.\u00a0 With the exception of\u00a02 forms with hastily scrawled comments. 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